Friday, July 18, 2008

My Meeting....

Ok, with great demand, here is how my meeting went.(Ok..only one person was demanding an update...LOL)

But first, I want to thank all of you who left me comments of well wishes and prayers. I appreciate it.

When I arrived at the restaurant, I was directed by the hostess to meeting Michelle. She was standing there.  She looked a little like I had imagined.  I had only seen the side of her face quickly at the courthouse, and I did see a professional photo of her...which as every one knows doesn't always look like yourself.

Immediately, we hugged! First I think the hug was in relief.  Relief that it was exactly who we'd expected...relief because we knew that the person hugging the other knew exactly how we felt and to know that we knew each other as not being crazy..that kinship that we share...it was just plain old relief.

We sat down in our booth...and it was like we were old friends.  We talked about her stuff going in her life(there is a major event going on in her life..but out of privacy...just know we talked about it).  Then the subject turned quickly to Chris.  I handed her the letter I had received..and let her read it.  Of course, she had questions on how Chris knew about her...and a few other things about the conversation I had with Chris.  I told her what was said to the best of my memory. She expressed her concerns for me and my safety, and we discussed being safe and all that other good stuff.

This of course led to stories...stories of the abuse. And it was funny, how though we had separate stories...the stories were the same. Different scenarios...but the same MOs.  We shook our heads in disgust..we laughed...we got somber...but there were no tears. None!  I thought for sure there would be crying, but I think the comfort of talking to someone who knows...just overshadowed it. It felt good.  I didn't feel like I was whining or complaining too much.  Often I feel this way...on my blog even, because I think "Noone wants to hear about your horrible ex or past!", but Michelle did.  I was happy(in a weird way) to hear her stories.  Because abusers tend to make you question things...make you think that your mind isn't right.  That you are making stuff up...when you know it happened!!

She even bought dinner, which was a huge relief to me.  Though I was ready to pay for my share, it would have been tough. I am a little low on cash until next payday..and her offering just lifted it off my shoulders. Of course, I would NEVER tell her that I was low on cash...but she did.  I protested of course, because I feel bad...but I decided that since she is in the service industry(again privacy for her)..I was going to have her do something that I need, and tip her big for it in a couple of months. Though she did say I could buy next time...which I certainly will(do you think next time I hang out with her..it would be ok to meet at McDonalds???LOL j/k).

But the best thing that has stayed with me since was when she said...."We should start an ex's of the monster's club...and you can be the president because you are the bravest person I know!"  I was so proud to be called brave...she made me feel real good about myself.

I think I have made myself a new friend...and the best thing of all..She has a great personality!

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