Monday, February 04, 2008

Im giving up on Men...

No, I don't have an attitude...just that they are so time consuming, and right now, I think I need to concentrate on Sunrise...and then school will be starting in May, I just dont think I could give my all to a relationship right now. I would love to, ohhhhhhhh how I would love to, but it just wont work, I dont think.

Having said that...I want to take it back. I dont want to give up on men, I want a man in my life, I want to be loved and love as much as I am loved. It would take a very patient man to be in our lives right now. I dont get to get out much because I just dont have a regular sitter. I have my mom, but she works every other weekend. So he would have to be able to be flexible.

I did sign up for Match.com for one month. I wanted to see what it was about. There are 4 guys that winked at me that I winked back at. We will see what kind of responses that happen. I dont know if they will even become anything, since you really have to pay for it to go any further than that. If they are not cheapskates, then I guess I will be hearing back from them..if they are..then that is the end..LOL

I am going to start reading single dad blogs, I just need to start finding them. Maybe I can get the perspective from their side.

As you can tell, Mark did not work out. He stated he didnt feel like I was "the one". I think it was because we took Sunrise to a gym type playground and he got reminded of what it was like to have a toddler around. That is ok..if he cant hang with Sunrise, he cant hang with me. LOL

I'm not meaning to sound like I'm down on men, because I really am not. I just don't think that men really get what it is like to be a single mom(except for those few that have their children full time of course). MOST men have their children part time, and can schedule their life around that...but for me, I have Sunrise full time. Her dad is not in the picture and never will be. So if you want me...you get Sunrise, it is a full time complete package.

Sometimes I wonder if I didn't give some of my dates a fair chance. I mean there was the truck driver...who really liked me and loved Sunrise. Treated her real well..but I just didn't feel the spark. I stayed with him for 3 months, and I just couldn't do it any more. Maybe it was just me. Or there is the quiet one who I really care about, but I cant stand to be around him in person because he just doesn't know how to communicate. When I say communicate, I mean he doesn't talk...he doesn't know how to carry on a conversation. You get him online in a conversation, he is absolutely hilarious. I told him many times if he was this open in person, then I would be jumping his bones. LOL He says he is working on it.

Ahhh the trials and tribulations of dating....Of course, I could be persuaded to date...just gotta find the right persuader. LOL

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